Brakes

Brakes stop your car. Sometimes before crashing into that Oak tree that just came out of nowhere. Sometimes before hitting a kid or getting your own hurt. Sometimes before the boys notice that you’re having too much fun in that fancy new car of yours.

One more time for Buffy: Literally, brakes stop your car.

Bring a canned good (something you would eat) around the shop one time on your way home from work or something. We’ll check your brakes for free. 10 minutes.

We’re happy to do what we can to make sure the cars in our neighborhood, and yours, too, can stop when they need to. Seriously, it takes 10 minutes. Bring that canned Octopus and we’ll make sure you can get your ass to the Quickie Mart to get more.

Brakes stop your car.

Have a look at the pic below to get an idea of a typical braking system on a typical car you or your sassy teen might be driving.

Brakes are a wear item, of course, and one time every year you should bring your car to your favorite mechanic’s garage and have him/her/spoon check them and replace pads and rotors as necessary. If your mechanic tells you “Literally, your brakes will be gone in 10 minutes and I literally am having an existential crisis about letting you leave without getting them done RIGHT NOW”

You should take that advice. Listen, it’s true – he’s only keeping you alive so he can keep fixing your car(s) forever. Job security!

You’re such a sleuth, lookit you.